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My dear Hubby...

Being away with you give me so much pain in my heart. I only hope that our love will keep us close to each other. I wish one day the distance between us won't be there anymore, and that would be the day i'll be in your arms forever. I love you my hubby with every meaning of it. I missed you so much that I wanted to be with you every seconds of each minute... I can't stop thinking about you in my mind just like how I wanted you to be in my life...

I love you so much Hubby... I love you and will always love you...


I’ve been thinking a lot lately about giving up dating, and more – giving up on the idea that there is someone out there for me.

I’m 27, and  the thing I wanted most in the world was to fall in love — the stay-up-talking-about-everything-and-anything, close-down-the-bar, always-know-you’re-in-my-corner kind of love, but it just hasn’t ever happened.

I’ve had relationships. I was married for three years to a good person who tried very hard to be a good husband. He was loyal, honest, dependable, and funny. I loved him in large part because I felt like he was the kind of guy I should marry. And I bent over backward to be the good wife. I made elaborate dinners and sewed curtains and kept track of appointment. And I followed his career at the expense of my own in a tough cross-country move. But in the end, the nagging feeling that he just didn’t get me, didn’t understand or appreciate my needs, blew up when I finally realized how suffocated I felt by a role that just wasn’t right for me. I couldn’t bring myself to have kids in a marriage where doing so would obliterate any chance I had to build something for myself.

I’ve been divorced for two years, I’ve been single ever since. one year ago, I had a baby on my own. Before my daughter was born, I had this feeling of being untethered, as if I could float away and it wouldn’t really make that much of a difference to anyone. Now I feel that my love for my daughter grounds me and gives a center to my life. She's amazing and it was the right choice for me.

At the same time, I’m still me. And the longing for a companion, someone to talk to and share jokes with and be in my corner and get me, has not gone away. Plus, I miss sex and physical affection a lot. About two months ago, I decided I was ready to start dating again. But I don’t think I was really prepared . Ghosting after a few dating sites, I joined DominoDate . There was one guy a few weeks ago that I liked a lot and had three dates with, but then he told me I was great but it wasn’t what he was looking for.

Aces VIP

We were attracted to each other. We got along together quite well. We had similar hobbies, similar senses of humor, liked the same shows, etc. We both wanted to have sex, and her husband hadn't touched her in years.

I did it because she was hot and she wanted to fuck. I didn't feel bad about it because I was single and didn't do anything wrong. Her relationship with her husband is between the two of them and it is not my job to police someone else's activities.

I did feel bad about it, but I'd do it again. Yes, I understand that I am hurting the husband, but I'm not really part of the marital equation. If she wasn't cheating with me, it would just be someone else. Eventually her husband started showing her affection again, and I met someone in in GA that I really clicked with, so we went on with our lives. We still talk every now and then.

seen VIP

I went to Cape Town in South Africa, last spring. I went to some clubs and bars, and ended up hooking up several times in the 10 days or so there, but one night was very memorable.

I was at a bar and these girls start talking to me.I hooked up with three of them that night. One took me to the bathroom and gave me head, but didn’t finish as her jaw hurt. Afterwards, I took two of her friends to my hotel. I almost had a third, the two wanted her to come, but she was terrified of my cock so only a threesome. I have to say, I prefer one on one, but it was a bucket list check mark. There was a lot of sex....


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Even though he never needed, wanted or asked for it. I gave him my heart, I gave him my soul, and I gave to him all the love that I hold within me. I gave him my respect and understanding. I gave him my compassion and my passion; I gave him faithfulness. I gave him my laughter; I opened my heart like never before and let him know my fears and insecurities, my strengths and weaknesses. I gave him my dreams and made him dreams mine.

I gave him my encouragement and my undying belief in him. I made him my future. If I could love him forever, that wouldn’t be long enough. All these things I give to him freely, willingly and without regret, because of my love for him, and they shall always remain his for no-one else is worthy.

But I know now that I have to try hard to move past him, because of the way he affects my everyday thoughts. I know that I have to quit hoping that I will ever get to hold or kiss him again. I don’t want to wake up anymore, in the middle of the night, thinking about him and not being able to get back to sleep.

The feeling I get in my heart drives me to the point of absolute insanity for now I see him without me. I need to fill that hole in my soul that I carry with me, from losing him, but I know that it will never go away. Love doesn’t work that way.

I need to know what it takes for me not to see him perfectly made face in my heart every time, even when he is not around, I still see him as if he is sitting right next to me. Oh! his beautiful smile, exquisite laugh and perfect body. My heart remains lifeless at the thought of permanently losing his smile, the sound of his laughter, his tears, his scent, his belief in me, his encouragement and the unending compassion that lies in his heart.

You see, I finally learned what real love is and the pain it can bring, and that real love is defined through his every day smile. If you ever find that ability to love and care for someone that much, where each waking day is better than the previous one only because he is still a part of your life, and no matter what happens or what your station in life is, be it rich or poor, love given or withdrawn that nothing can change your heart, because you love someone unconditionally then and only then shall you truly know where real strength and love come from.

I wish God found me worthy to be the head of his heart but I can’t take back what’s in my heart or all the feelings that go with it now, or the fact that every good thing I am today or was capable of becoming, I owe to him and leave with him. Real love is a rare and wonderful thing, and as with most rare things, very hard to hang on to and believe it is truly yours.

It’s not just saying the words; it’s when you cradle that person’s face in your hands and look them in the eyes as your heart beat races and say to them “no, I really mean it, I truly love you


In college I hooked up with girls, as did many other young women at my college. One of my first experiences was with an older girl, let’s call her Elise, who I thought was so incredibly beautiful and awesome. She seduced me quickly and before I knew it, I was driving her car around and sleeping in her room almost every night. I felt that we were serious and she led on the image that we were serious too.

One night I came to her room on a week night after being awake late studying with friends. I climbed in bed and laid there, wide awake and unable to sleep from caffeine. Just as I was drifting off, I heard someone open her door and looked up from bed to see who was coming into the room. It was really dark and perhaps I had my suspicions about what this late night visit (no knock or anything) might indicate, so I said nothing and laid still. After crossing the room quietly, a person reached out her hand to the bed as if she was going to climb in. “Um HELLO,” I said sitting up, instantly realizing by her outline and stammering voice that it was a class mate of Elise, let’s call her “messy ponytail girl”. “Oh. Um. Hey”, messy ponytail girl stammered, “…I came to ask you about our media studies project…” trailing off. Blatant total lie. Elise replied with some equally shoddy and unbelievable retort and messy ponytail girl exited the room. I laid there for a second fuming and then said “What the FUCK was that? Why the fuck would she come to your room and come over to the bed like she was going to CLIMB in it with you??” Elise replied that absolutely nothing was going on and that I was being paranoid. I swallowed my discontent and went to sleep.

Sure enough it was only a matter of days before it came out that Elise and messy ponytail girl had been seeing each other on the sly and quickly becoming an item. Elise and I ended things (I was completely disgusted) and she and messy ponytail girl went on to date for two years. To this day I consider Elise a complete liar for her dishonesty and actions.

Sometimes it takes a late night intruder to make one’s true colors come out.

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